The end of my patience

I have lots of ideas or thoughts to post about, but in reality we are in the dog days of summer and it's been rough. The kids seem extra whiny and with it so hot outside there isn't a lot of escape sometimes. I think it's just the post-vacation doldrums, but I've been struggling not going crazy! By 8:00 am, I'm already so worn down and annoyed by all the cries and whines and tantrums. You're shocked that my children do that? Yes, it's true. Behind all the pictures are little people with opinions and feelings and desires!

Everything came to a head on Friday and Saturday. On Friday, I ending up posting about it on Facebook. We were having Brandon and Rebecca for dinner and Brandon ended up showing up an hour early. He brought Blue Bell ice cream and several Lindt chocolate bars and then asked what he could do to help. I asked if he could help Willa clean up the toys and he went right to work entertaining and cleaning and the girls were happy and I had a few minutes respite and it was great. He's a good guy.

On Saturday, Ryan was helping Rob Thalman move some of their things so he was gone most of the day. Around 9:00 am, I was just determining to be happier and more patient. June started strumming the strings on the little harp, which made Willa want to play. I told Willa she could, but that she needed to wait a minute for me to get a little stool. Well, she didn't wait and then she pushed June out of the way (I think, I was in the other room quickly), which made June push, and then CRASH the little harp fell over!

I ran in and thankfully, things could have been much, much worse. It broke a big chunk of wood off of the harp, but it was mainly cosmetic. I was mainly worried that the little harp would have fallen on the big harp and punctured the sound board, which would have been thousands and thousands of dollars to repair. Still, there is a big chunk of wood off of the folk harp on the sound board. I think we can probably glue it on with wood glue, but I'm also nervous to do any fixes myself. Still, it's probably not worth the thousands it would be to ship it to Chicago for a real fix.

Anyway, I was fuming and angry and sad and mad at myself for losing it, but also mad at them (especially Willa  because she is the one who is old enough to know better). I found myself wanting to slap her! I wouldn't do that, but that's how I was feeling. I roughly put her in time out and sadly, yelled in a not nice mommy voice. Then, I shut myself in my room for a good while. I'm calm now and I try not to dwell on it. Things like this are part of having children and I accept that.

It was just a rough end to a rough week (and sadly, this Monday has not started out better as far as whining and screaming). I'm trying to figure out what we need to do. We went to the park this morning and maybe I need to get some crafts to do while we're inside, which is not my strong point. Anyway, things are getting real here, folks.